Wednesday Weirdness #42

1. If you were to be reincarnated as an inanimate object, what would you choose to come back as? A chef's favorite knife. I would get to be around all the food and not gain weight. I would get cleaned every day, and a chef's favorite. Also I can be sharpened and work forever. Along with being shiny, sharp and functioning.

2. If you were told that you would be equipped with the perfect comeback to any remark, but it would cost you five years of your life would you take it? No, I can let someone else take the remark and end early. I am pretty good at it already.

3. What would be the most shocking thing your mom could have ever told you? That my dad isn't my dad. She has only been with him, and I have a lot of his traits. So to hear that would be impossible to believe, but happens to people.

4. If you could spend 24 hours as the opposite gender, what would you do? Pee standing up without having to undo everything, yank on my penis, masturbate, insert into the "pocket" to see how that side feels and go shirtless. Thank God no bras!

5. Describe the ugliest outfit you have ever worn in public. I had black parachute pants, with silver zippers on them, and weird pockets. I was in middle school and wanted to be cool. It had some black and silver top. At the time it was just ok, now it was UGLY.

6. Do you like to celebrate Valentine's Day or do you wish you could magically pouf it from the calendar? I have celebrated it, at least by sending and receiving cards. I have been in relationships most of my teen/adult life, but no Vday I can totally remember. It is just a day to wear red and pink, put on pretty jewelry, an excuse to eat out and end the day with hot fucking. Sounds like another day in porn to me, with some chocolate sauce and whipped cream. Nothing special, and I think it is over rated when wives feel "cheated" and forgotten on a retail shopping day. Leave it or ditch it, doesn't matter to me.